Navigating Relationships: Couples Therapy at Empathetix Psychology

Relationships can be a wonderful source of joy and fulfilment but they can also come with their own set of challenges. When communication breaks down or conflicts arise, it can be beneficial to seek support from a professional.

Empathetix Psychology utilises the Gottman Method Couples Therapy approach to increase closeness and friendship behaviours, whilst addressing conflict productively, and building a life of shared meaning together. The Gottman Method involves customising principles from the research to each couple’s particular patterns and challenges.

Seven Principles

• Build Love Maps: This refers to an ongoing awareness of our partners’ worlds as they move through time: how they think and feel, what day-to-day life is like for them, and their values, hopes, aspirations, and stresses.

• Express Fondness and Admiration: Couples who function well are able to appreciate and enjoy most aspects of each partner’s behaviour and learn to live with differences.

• Turn Toward One Another: Conversational patterns of interest and respect, even about mundane topics are crucial to happiness. Couples who turn toward successfully maintain a 20:1 ratio of expressing interest or acknowledgment vs. ignoring conversational gambits. This is referred to as the “Emotional Bank Account.” Couples who are highly successful keep a 5:1 ratio in conflict discussions, even Turning Towards while arguing.

• Accept Influence: Members of a couple who take the other partner’s preferences into account and are willing to compromise and adapt are happiest. Being able to yield and maintain mutual influence, while avoiding power struggles, helps couples keep a balance of power that feels reasonable and builds trust.

• Solve Problems That Are Solvable: Couples who can find compromise on issues are using five tactics. They soften start up so the beginning of the conversation leads to a satisfactory end. They offer and respond to repair attempts, or behaviours that maintain the emotional connection and emphasise “we/us” over individual needs. They effectively soothe themselves and their partner. They use compromise and negotiation skills. They are tolerant of one another’s vulnerabilities and ineffective conversational habits, keeping the focus on shared concern for the well-being of the relationship.

• Manage Conflict and Overcome Gridlock: The Gottman Method helps couples manage, not resolve, conflict. Conflict is viewed as inherent in relationship and doesn’t go away. Happy couples report the majority of their conflicts, 69% are perpetual in nature, meaning they are present throughout the course of time and are dealt with only as needed. These recurrent themes become part of the couple’s shared landscape and are kept in perspective, not dwelt upon.

• Create Shared Meaning: Connection in relationship occurs as each person experiences the multitude of ways in which their partner enriches their life with a shared history and helps them find meaning and make sense of struggles.

By seeking couples therapy at Empathetix Psychology, you are taking a proactive step towards improving your relationship and creating a more fulfilling connection with your partner. Whether you are experiencing trust issues, communication breakdowns, or any other challenges in your relationship, you can navigate these obstacles and build a stronger foundation for your future together.

If you and your partner are in need of couples therapy, consider reaching out to Empathetix Psychology. Take the first step towards a healthier and happier relationship today.

Best wishes from the psychologists of Empathetix Psychology.